The art of release

You live your life like a "normal person" up until a point when you are mature enough to self-analyze and start noticing specific patterns in yourself. I cannot remember which self-discovery was the first one exactly, but the most certain one was that I am an anxious person. I wouldn't group myself with deeply anxious people, but I definitely see some common traits in myself.

The Weight of Planning and Uncertainty

One of those traits is overthinking and pre-planning everything in my head. If I know I have to be somewhere tomorrow, or even later in the week for something important, I will try to plan my whole day around it. I want to know far in advance when to wake up, what to do, and what not to do, just to manage everything as fast and as smoothly as possible.

On those days, I usually sleep very badly. It's not even that the task itself is stressful, but the sheer importance of it keeps me from sleeping well. I usually wake up before my alarm because, subconsciously, I know I need to be ready and start the day the proper way.

I also really hate being late. I plan everything so that I am on time, and if I am even a minute late, I start to feel very anxious. Even if it's not a big deal, I just don't feel good about myself when it happens. Uncertainty always makes me anxious. With time, of course, that feeling diminishes a little, but it never completely goes away.

Learning to Slow Down

I also noticed that I used to always be in a rush—running, pacing around, constantly moving. Lately, I have started practicing being slower. I try to walk slower, talk slower, and breathe through everything. I try not to rush if it is not necessary, choosing instead to stay in the moment, because rushing rarely works in our favor.

Along with this, I have started enjoying slow mornings. I try to wake up slowly, walk around, drink my water, and allow my body to wake up naturally without jumping into tasks immediately. Of course, this isn't very doable when you have to go to work early every day, but at the moment, thankfully, I am free of that burden. I can wake up when I want and greet the day as I wish to.

Noticing Physical Tension

Another thing I have noticed is how tense my body is. A couple of years ago, I started having jaw pain and realized I have bruxism, which comes from constantly clenching my jaw. I never even knew I did this until I turned 32 or so.

Recently, I noticed that even when I am in bed trying to sleep, my body remains tense. Even in a comfortable position, my hips are always tight. Noticing this helps, because I can immediately remind myself to relax my jaw and my body. It feels like a sign of growth, of becoming more grounded and self-aware.

Calming Practices

To help with this, I try to implement a few calming practices:

• Stretching and Yoga: I won't lie and say I meditate regularly—I actually do it very rarely—but I try to do yoga at least a couple of times a week. Stretching my tense muscles and joints leaves me feeling deeply relaxed.
• Time with Pets: I have two pets, and just spending time with them or looking at them relaxes me and gives me a boost of serotonin.
• Houseplants: A few years ago, I also started keeping houseplants. Having them around, watching them grow and flower, makes me feel better overall.

I think the key is simply learning to notice things. Even if someone makes a rude comment, I try to listen and find any useful context in it rather than just reacting. 

We cannot program ourselves to stop caring about things, but we can train ourselves to be less anxious, to let go faster, and to worry less. It truly makes a huge impact on your life.

My grandmother, who is now 93 years old, has never been sick in her life and has never had any serious health issues. She also has an exceptional memory. I am not a doctor, but I am pretty sure this is because she is the calmest person I have ever met. I have never once seen her angry or nervous. Even in the most irritating moments, she would just laugh it off.

I think that is the most important factor in staying healthy, because our nervous system is directly connected to every vital organ in our body.

We have to work on these things because stress always impacts our physical health. We need to do everything we possibly can to protect ourselves and take care of our bodies and minds.